you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
