i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
Randomize
