Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
We talked him into tasing himself.
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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