Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
Randomize
