I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
You called me at 2am singing 'happy birthday' while screaming 'I fucking love you' verses, all while eating a burrito and taking a piss off your apartment balcony
Yeah I know, the people below me already told me
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
A bitchslap is in order.
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