I need help removing her.
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
Randomize
