I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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