hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Randomize