I think i sorta joined a cult last night
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
My vagina just clenched in fear
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
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