If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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