This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
a search helicopter?!
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Randomize
