I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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