JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
Randomize
