I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
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