I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Randomize
