Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
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