Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
It was confusing and full of hummus
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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