You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize
