let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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