Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
Randomize
