3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize
