playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Randomize
