that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
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