my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize