So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
