one might say we're banned from that church
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
