you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
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