Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize
