I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
Randomize
