uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
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