You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
Randomize
