i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
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