He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Randomize
