So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
Randomize
