Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
Also, beer. Big fan.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
Randomize
