Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
