I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
Randomize
