I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
He had one of those small greek statue penises
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
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