Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
there was a trapeze. enough said
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
Randomize
