Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Randomize