I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
