i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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