Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
Randomize
