just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
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