She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
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