my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize