office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
Randomize
