Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
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