I smell stomach acid.
i think i have two assholes
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
