So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
