Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
