ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
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