if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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